Sponge bath it is.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Two words: blizzard sex
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
