Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize