No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
