that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
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