OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
