dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Randomize
