Texts From Last Night

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  (314): View more from Missouri

  The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.

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  (314): The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order. http://tfl.nu/ghcj
  Replies (11) Good night (958) Bad night (3379)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...

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  (814): You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum... http://tfl.nu/p3s1
  Replies (20) Good night (7377) Bad night (2132)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.

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  (608): no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed. http://tfl.nu/ynv2
  Replies (13) Good night (5476) Bad night (1013)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy

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  (803): I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy http://tfl.nu/vzq5
  Replies (11) Good night (5297) Bad night (979)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits

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  (615): of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits http://tfl.nu/a8zr
  Replies (29) Good night (1745) Bad night (7765)
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  (830): View more from Texas

  Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester

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  (830): Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester http://tfl.nu/187b
  Replies (5) Good night (2107) Bad night (1019)
• Favorite

  (864): View more from South Carolina

  Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.

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  (864): Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded. http://tfl.nu/5fxu
  Replies (21) Good night (3957) Bad night (2044)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation

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  (703): Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation http://tfl.nu/67qo
  Replies (14) Good night (2215) Bad night (761)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.

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  (817): There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be. http://tfl.nu/26vp
  Replies (15) Good night (1966) Bad night (770)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.

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  (715): During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me. http://tfl.nu/euwh
  Replies (30) Good night (4968) Bad night (1147)
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america

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  (650): Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america http://tfl.nu/igww
  Replies (8) Good night (1895) Bad night (597)
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  (352): View more from Florida

  Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night

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  (352): Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night http://tfl.nu/ez8j
  Replies (15) Good night (754) Bad night (1280)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.

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  (775): I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice. http://tfl.nu/qaps
  Replies (1) Good night (991) Bad night (311)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that

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  (908): it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that http://tfl.nu/wsh1
  Replies (1) Good night (492) Bad night (281)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.

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  (216): I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen. http://tfl.nu/tj0a
  Replies (1) Good night (245) Bad night (124)

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