I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Randomize
