There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
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