I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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