i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
