His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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