Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
