Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i just had sex bonerless
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Randomize
