We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
