Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
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I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
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I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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