the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
