Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
What drink are we having for lunch?
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
