How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
