My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
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He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
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