it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
People in love make me want to vomit
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize
