"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
My feet surprised me
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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