This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
