I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize