if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
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I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
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Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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