i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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