He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
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