Texts From Last Night

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  (251): View more from Alabama

  Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.

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  (251): Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester. http://tfl.nu/tcd3
  Replies (14) Good night (3680) Bad night (693)
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  (914): View more from New York

  oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.

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  (914): oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress. http://tfl.nu/z9ci
  Replies (9) Good night (932) Bad night (2878)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love

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  (512): its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love http://tfl.nu/kjeb
  Replies (23) Good night (3876) Bad night (1333)
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  (951): View more from California

  I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it

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  (951): I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it http://tfl.nu/eb7i
  Replies (5) Good night (1121) Bad night (3381)
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now

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  (306): We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now http://tfl.nu/pjjq
  Replies (23) Good night (3907) Bad night (844)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.

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  (513): The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk. http://tfl.nu/ersv
  Replies (2) Good night (3740) Bad night (918)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.

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  (717): Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome. http://tfl.nu/70l7
  Replies (10) Good night (4977) Bad night (1004)
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  (914): View more from New York

  I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds

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  (914): I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds http://tfl.nu/eevd
  Replies (4) Good night (1340) Bad night (1387)
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  (626): View more from California

  Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.

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  (626): Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here. http://tfl.nu/81th
  Replies (3) Good night (2114) Bad night (795)
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.

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  (231): I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this. http://tfl.nu/nn25
  Replies (5) Good night (1829) Bad night (787)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.

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  (919): I have a cut on my head from a tambourine. http://tfl.nu/wa5x
  Replies (3) Good night (1531) Bad night (601)
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  (239): View more from Florida

  Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course

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  (239): Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course http://tfl.nu/4x8m
  Replies (2) Good night (745) Bad night (398)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.

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  (973): THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK. http://tfl.nu/ffuw
  Replies (2) Good night (1092) Bad night (350)
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  (760): View more from California

  dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself

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  (760): dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself http://tfl.nu/8oqh
  Replies (2) Good night (359) Bad night (760)
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants

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  (423): You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants http://tfl.nu/9mg7
  Replies (2) Good night (520) Bad night (275)

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