so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
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