And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
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