I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
