I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Im part way to drunk.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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