Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
