she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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