but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
