Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Two words: blizzard sex
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
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