I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize
