yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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