Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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