why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
