The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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