He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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