Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
