Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Two words: nipple clamps
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