I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
