Texts From Last Night

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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.

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  (780): i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least. http://tfl.nu/btfu
  Replies (29) Good night (834) Bad night (2422)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.

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  (404): Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that. http://tfl.nu/0caw
  Replies (13) Good night (1098) Bad night (4802)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days

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  (703): Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days http://tfl.nu/tlow
  Replies (25) Good night (5443) Bad night (1076)
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  (818): View more from California

  Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.

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  (818): Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works. http://tfl.nu/ca8d
  Replies (4) Good night (5740) Bad night (1421)
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  (646): View more from New York

  it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there

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  (646): it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there http://tfl.nu/bxrn
  Replies (6) Good night (5135) Bad night (1225)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.

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  (703): like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it. http://tfl.nu/vg3u
  Replies (22) Good night (6165) Bad night (1338)
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  (786): View more from Florida

  If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up

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  (786): If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up http://tfl.nu/h8cl
  Replies (14) Good night (5448) Bad night (1289)
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina

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  (573): Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina http://tfl.nu/35k1
  Replies (7) Good night (651) Bad night (2698)
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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.

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  (504): That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop. http://tfl.nu/jrhx
  Replies (2) Good night (1416) Bad night (649)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?

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  (919): He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ? http://tfl.nu/856o
  Replies (12) Good night (1715) Bad night (657)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  I was told my cock was a religious experience.

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  (913): I was told my cock was a religious experience. http://tfl.nu/13mw
  Replies (6) Good night (1945) Bad night (566)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...

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  (801): He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"... http://tfl.nu/bw0v
  Replies (4) Good night (429) Bad night (921)
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  (323): View more from California

  Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...

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  (323): Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow... http://tfl.nu/iqf2
  Replies (5) Good night (1232) Bad night (304)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.

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  (407): If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry. http://tfl.nu/rq3w
  Replies (3) Good night (612) Bad night (286)
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.

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  (901): So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity. http://tfl.nu/0b51
  Replies (5) Good night (970) Bad night (179)

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