I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
These 23 People Had Sex With Someone From Completely Different Cultures
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
25 Medical Facts That Need To Be Common Knowledge
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.