Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
