I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize