Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Randomize