Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
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