He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Randomize
